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it is morning. i am feeling good, silent and i wish to express something or really i need to do something constructive, meditative, repetitive. and typing is something i love to do, which is talking and at the same time dumping everything away and filtering and gaining, like sifting out for gold. this helps me to reach silence or physical relaxation and you know what, it also friggin opens up strand to the awesome brilliant light in between my eye brows. i like incense and i like being physically strong bc it means to be mentally strong as well, which helps with seeing and intuition and trusting more in yourself. something challenging for me has been to open up my heart center and keeping this in mind helps to balance things. if you have power and a good intellect, one might forget the heart, which is a great torch that always burns quietly. i have been forgetting something, to teach by example. i delve, swim, hike in the midst of words and i find that i have a lovely dialogue all the time, mixed here and there, with a not so lovely dialogue and moments of silence spread out as well. the thing i must remember is the art of ignoring. it is a nice samurai sword. bc when you ignore with proper timing you simply keep on moving forward. and then for me this goes in conjunction with simple acts of goodness which speak loudly with their invisible silent, mega booming loudspeaker .lol. it is nice to have this electronic window. you, computer screen, wisest mirror, ruthless reflector, waste of time sometimes, gate to the vastest, loftiest thoughts, telescope who brings to me a face from the galaxy of another country. you, bridge who brings ensembles and singers, you who mediates the four directions of music. i gaze at you, little atomic ink dots appearing out of nowhere who like loyal and efficient soldiers stamp and stamp the directness of my digits into the static electricity of language, stamp the currents, the waves that begin in the atlantic ocean of my heart. i am almost love now. i am peaceful. my equanimity washes away easily. like in an animation movie of a humanoid made of water, my body of water merges, is splashed with redness that leeches my purity and deposits liquid crap iron. i must remember to be peaceful. i must remember water. i am water now. i actually have to pee. simple things in everyday. i am conscious of breath as i type. my little powerful spiders i have for hands, patient and one dimensional and trickling with lightning bolts of thoughts and heart-jolts. i breathe now, slowly and inaudibly. this radiohead paranoid android song is lovely. i must remember the void in fully being present to the enjoyment of taking slow natural breaths. it is in the lungs that reside a great space to be free. it is abundance of emptiness. abundance of this strange adapt-to-all energy bc when you meditate or are silent or expend energy in a passion of yours, you are actually spending energy and resting at the same time and gaining something else. i have thought of the difference between peace and love. they are two hair strands right next to each other giving each other a pat on the back. at this moment i would like to extend this peacefulness further (lol) so like a good set of charged batteries it can last all day. it will end bc this peacefulness is like a miracle of a sand castle spontaneously appearing by the shore. i take words very seriously and then i remember that they are a constellation of miniature sails pushed to me and away from from me on the ocean by the hands of many winds.